Broken Words
Apparently we utter 15,000 words on average per day. I wonder what my mean is? During a typical day I have one five minute conversation with my mum, and that's it for oral communication. How many words is that? A couple of hundred? Does that 15,000 include all the conversations I have in my head? Or is it the spoken part of the act that is important? I also wonder if this is why I’ve taken to writing since becoming ill. Is it an innate urge from my brain to get something out in some form or another? Of course writing is very different to conversing as it’s very one-sided, there isn’t the bouncing around of ideas, new thoughts and ideas sparked unless it’s IM or bantering on Facebook. In a way, I suppose writing is very similar to those conversations we have in our minds, I’m sure you know what I’m talking about, we must all do it, those imaginary colloquies with other people and of course always getting our desired outcome, the practice run before saying something close to our heart to make sure we get out exactly what we want to say, reliving almost forgotten memories or playing out our hopes and desires. Surely I’m not the only one? Or maybe I am and I've just divulged something really embarrassing. Well it wouldn't be the first time and it certainly isn't the most humiliating.
Therefore is my writing the product of all the conversations I’m no longer having? I think it might well be as I am a bit of a language bunny, always have been, my greatest pleasure as a child was reading, entering wonderful imagined worlds for days and days on end. Of course there is the little matter of my illness and chatting can be very draining for me, I need a lot of quiet to be able to get through the day and the conversations in my head are calm ones and expend very little energy. So, what will this do to me in the long run, the fact that I’m not running linguistically as I should? Do we ever forget how to converse, how to interact? Will I only be able to effectively communicate through the written word? Only time will tell and well, if that is the case, hopefully when I finally get well or at least get some proper medical help I might, just might, be able to make it as a writer.
3 comments :
Cara,
I don't think you have to worry about losing your ability with words. It is there in abundance.
And I do think that the long silence impels us to write, for the reasons you mentioned. Those words need to go SOMEWHERE even if it's just ... to yourself. And there is the hope, if it's on the net, that someone else will read them, will hear you.
I know the Long Silence is the reason I am compelled to write as I do. And the more interaction I have with other people -- curiously, it causes me to lose my edge, my urge, to write.
I write best in enforced solitude I think .....
I have a very loud and active inner voice and always have had, even when I have lots of people around to talk to the conversations in my head still go on! However, I have met people who claim to not do this at all, so maybe it's not everyone?
Serisously Sarah it's not everyone? Well there you go. I bet there's study somewhere about it, why some of us do it and some don't. Maybe it's got to do with our linguistic skills?
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